Jacksonisms...Take Two

Things to remember if/when you should ever have a two year old:

1. Everything you say will be remembered and they will pick the weirdest times to repeat it out loud.

2. They will notice at some point that your husband has hair in both his ears and his nose. Your husband will then be told that it's "dose" (gross). Try to keep a straight face. You can do it.

3. If you ever either on purpose or by accident, pass gas in front of, beside, behind or anywhere in the vicinity near them, they will announce it to the world, try to pick up your shirt/night gown and proceed to tell you loudly that he's "looking for dat toot".

4. If you have a little boy, and his little body parts are given names, expect him to refer to these body parts...and often. He loves watching Dora and Go, Diego, Go! so much that he no longer has a turtle in his diaper...he has a baby tortuga in there. He also sings a song about it. Loudly.

5. Expect that same little boy to be very bold when it comes to him and "dat toot" as well. It will go off at random times and it will be announced with a giggle that "haha I tooted" but at least it's followed up (most of the time) with an "cuse me".

6. Don't ever try to be funny about asking him what that noise was....he will tell you exactly what it was, that it came out of his diaper, and that his hiney is like a vent that blows the air out. (He found out what vents were a few weeks ago while playing on my bed and looking up at the ceiling and asking.."What's dose?" I told you...they remember EVERYTHING.)

7. Be prepared to laugh outloud at any given moment. When I told him today that I went to the doctor, he patted me on the hand. I told him I had to get a shot in my arm and that it hurt but I didn't cry. I was then told "I so proud of you. Dat's awdum!" (awesome) The greeter ladies at Walmart must have thought I lost my mind for laughing so hard right then and there.

8. Although they will have times where they can't sleep, wake up after bad dreams or just need another hug. You will drag yourself out of bed. You will walk with one eye open down the hall, bump into a wall or two and take a second to figure out how to open their door. But when those little hands reach out to you out of that bed and you hear the words, "Just hold me Mommy", you won't remember anything that came before that.

9. I think every child at this age goes through a dancing phase. Jackson's has hit big time. His favorite pasttime is to sneak into our bedroom, mess around with the alarm clock until the music comes on....turn the dial until something crazy comes on (tonight's selection was some kind of slow R & B song) and then proceed to get down and get funky. When you walk in and catch him, he looks up at you like YOU'RE the one interrupting him and he's doing just what he's supposed to be doing, then proceeds to continuing dancing.

10. They will talk your ears off. They will ask you 50 times where you're going and when will you be there. They will drive you nuts with the "I gotta potty" and then sitting there 15 minutes and doing everything else but pottying. They will make mess after mess while experimenting with their dinner and seeing exactly which foods can also be used as finger paint.

But when they're half awake/half asleep and headed to bed and they reach over and kiss you and tell you "I love you to the moon and back"...it's all worth it. You go to bed. You wake up, and you start all over again....just to get back to that point again the next night.

They drive you crazy. They make you laugh. They make you cry. But no one can ever capture your heart faster than they can. And it's all so unbelievably worth it.

My Hubby

I blog a lot about my kids. Anyone that knows me personally or just from my blogs, knows that they are my world. I love every chance I have to write about something funny, exciting, interesting...good or bad...about my kids. But I just wanted to write a different one today.

You have the Sticky Hands...and that's my Jackson. You have the Glitter....and that's my Gracie. And you have the What's for Dinner....and that's my Lawrence. I feel like I never say enough about him and the husband he is, so this blog is for him.

My husband is the most amazing man in this world. Not only is he the smartest guy I've ever met, he's the most loving and compassionate man as well. After 11 years of marriage and 2 kids, there is not a day that goes by that he doesn't tell me that he loves me. And more than that, there isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't show me.

A lot of people that know us, know how we met. To this day I'm amazed at how many things had to go completely perfect in order for us to even meet, much less get together, fall in love and end up where we are now. I prayed two years with my pastor, for the man that God wanted me to have in my life. I talked to God one-on-one, pretty much like I type in my blog...just straight forward and to the point. I told him exactly what I was looking for in a man, and I often listed the qualities that I was looking for.....I prayed and I prayed and I waited....two whole years. Was it worth the wait? Absolutely.

I am so thankful for such a Godly husband. And not only that, but he is the most amazing and loving father. Our kids look up to him in such a way that I just have no words to express how it makes me feel. And there is such a bond between them that I know some fathers and children only wish they could have.

Thank you, Honey for not only being such a wonderful husband, but for being the most amazing father to our children. I love you with all my heart and I know that I always have you in my corner. And I hope you know that I'm always in yours. I know I'm not always the easiest person to live with, but you have always loved me unconditionally, at my worst and at my best, and you've never once made me feel less than wonderful. Thank you for all that you are...and all that you think you're not.

I love you,

Melissa

Calling All Shop-a-holics

If you ever get bored, truly bored...can't find a single thing to do to entertain yourself....go shopping with children.

Now, I have to say upfront, you have to be picky as to which children you take with you. There are some you just can't let out in public (there are also adults that fit that category as well, but I digress). For this example...let's choose...oh, I don't know....Gracie and Jackson.

Now, my kids aren't perfect. I'm not one of those parents who believe that somewhere, somehow, they're little precious wings and halo must have fallen off sometime after conception and before birth. You know those parents. You've seen them...the parents you roll your eyes at so much, they start to resemble a slot machine in Vegas (your eyes, not the parents). "Oh, MY child does this. Oh, MY child does that."...the parents that feel their kids can do no wrong. Anyway, back to my point. My kids aren't perfect but they are so good out in public when we're shopping whether it's for a quick trip to Walmart or a day of walking around the Galleria. On top of this, they are so stinking funny. They do things at the drop of a hat that have you laughing to the point of almost crying. It's during these moments that I'm glad I have a camera on my phone.

Gracie and Jackson crack me up constantly. If it's not Jackson and his funny little conversations, it's Gracie and her quick wit and sarcasm. They keep me in constant stitches sometimes. Don't think that's possible? Go to Party City with them and walk in the back through the Halloween costumes. Talk about one laugh after another! If it's not Jackson wanting to try on every kind of hat and then asking me, "How I look, Mommy? Am I so funny and coot (cute)?", then it's Gracie looking through the costumes, some of them of the adult variety (but not "naughty", just older) and her picking it up and saying, "What is THIS, why would someone want it and what the heck do you do with it??" and when I look, I've noticed she's picked up a dominatrix whip or a corset or some weird leather butt-less chaps. Try keeping a straight face on that one. I dare you.

I just feel so blessed to have my kiddos. We have our ups and downs and times we butt heads, but for the most part, it's just one big party. And I can just imagine what hats and costumes they'd pick out for that one!

Jacksonisms

Having a two year old is very interesting. It's a time where they're part baby and part big boy/girl. There's the joys and adventures of potty training. There are times where you sit back a lot because "No Mommy, me can do it." I think this is one of the times in their lives that they go through some major changes in all kinds of areas. Along with these changes, some of the funniest things will come out of their mouths. (Some of the weirdest things will go INTO their mouths too, just FYI)

Jackson is not quite 2 1/2 years old now. Just since his birthday in May, I've seen some of the biggest changes in him verbal wise. It's like he went from little words to big sentences overnight. Sometimes it freaks me out when it dawns on me, "Wow, I'm having a conversation with my two year old." A conversation...not a struggle with words or a rant or a temper tantrum. A conversation. Now granted, most of our conversations take place on the potty, but that's neither here nor there. It's just truly amazing to fully realize how your child thinks and feels about things around him/her, and how he/she chooses to express those thoughts. And they can come up with some doozies!

My favorite part of them learning to really talk, is seeing how they look at the world. Talk about an eye opening experience! This is when you truly realize how much they really have paid attention to you and how much they've soaked up and remembered. You will hear things coming back at you that is almost word for word what you said to your husband when you thought they were playing and not paying attention. And as they get older, they get your voice and mannerisms downpat too, but that's a whole other story.

And be ready when they start school! Fun times, especially when they get to be school age and the teacher learns far more about you than she/he cared to! (Don't forget to have the talk about how what's said at home, STAYS at home. Trust me on this. You'll thank me) The teacher doesn't want to know that Daddy has gas or that Mommy's boobs hurt during her cycle or any of that lovely stuff! I know this from both sides as a teacher and then as a parent. I guarantee, teachers will hear some things from some kids that makes her not want to look some parents in the eyes!

I said all of this to say this....kids are unpredictable! They can make you laugh or cry at the drop of a hat. And right now, I am enjoying the 2's so much. Every day, my husband will text, email or call me and ask...."Has he said anything funny yet?" Because we know it's a daily occurrence. So, without further ado, here is a list of Jacksonisms that I've kept up with. Enjoy!
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On Garbage Day:
Jackson hears the garbage truck outside, and stops what he's doing and runs over to me.

Jackson: What's dat noise?
Mommy: I think that's the garbage man.
Jackson: I NEED to go see.

So we both get up and go to the front door where he looks out the side window. He's in awe because they're right in front of our house. He sees the truck pull forward and then the garbage man running behind it to catch up.

Jackson: That man took our garbage, Mommy.
Mommy: Yes, he did.
He stands there a few seconds still watching them, then looks up to me and says..."Well that was berry nice!"

It just floored me that he's not caught up in the world as much as everyone else. He has no clue that we pay these people to come and get our garbage. He just thought it was so nice of them to come and get it for us!

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Just a few days ago, we're going to the potty. I walk into the bathroom but he stops at the door. I turn around and he's just standing there looking at his hands. I start to say something, but then he starts yelling....

Jackson: Cut my fingers off!! Cut my fingers off!!
Mommy: What?! Why in the world would I cut your fingers off??
Jackson: Mommy, cut my fingers off!!

At this point, I'm not sure what in the world is going on. I'm trying not to panic but I can't think of a single thing that would make him want his fingers cut off! He runs up to me and puts his fingers in my face....

Jackson: Cut my fingers off, Mommy!!
Mommy: Jackson.....why do you want Mommy to cut your fingers off??

He looks at me like I have three heads and he can't figure out why I'm not understanding what he is so clearly telling me....He gives me this huge sigh...and then...

Jackson: Because....they scratch-ted me!!

Then it dawns on me.....he wants his fingernails cut! Duh! And not to mention, Whew!

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Overheard between Gracie and Jackson:

Gracie: Jackson, are you a big boy?
Jackson: (sigh) No, Sissy! I Jack-Jack!

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Yesterday, Lawrence hears a noise coming from down the hall. He goes around the corner and sees that Jackson had unlocked the front door's bottom locks and opened the door. Lawrence reaches up and puts the chain on the door and says...

Daddy: Jack! You can't just open the door by yourself! You're dangerous!
Jackson: I not dangerous! I good!


It's never boring around here, that's for sure.